I so desperately want to understand every twist and turn in the plot of my life story.
I know I spend far too much time wondering why things have played out the way they have, and dreaming about the rest of the story that still lies before me. I love a great story. I am fascinated by the motivations that drive someone to take the time to tell their story. I delight in uncovering themes woven into small details throughout someone’s narrative. I believe God is the author of his great story we are all a part of, and I believe he cares enough about each one of us to weave those powerful, but sometimes quiet themes into this one life we are given.
This summer I have had the joy of seeing God make a way for me to follow him into a thrilling next chapter in my story. My God can move mountains. My God can calm raging seas. I am convinced there is absolutely nothing my God cannot do. I am in awe of the majesty, power, and boundless love of my King: my Savior and my God.
Even so, I’ve got questions. I’m convinced there’s a reason for some of the breathtaking twists and turns God has guided me through in this life. I’m convinced this story is not finished yet. My heart swells as I consider the overwhelming grace God has lavished on me. I don’t deserve his goodness, but may I forever receive and extend his goodness with joy. At the same time, my heart aches as I see the tragedy caused by my own choices or someone else’s. Sometimes I wonder, how long must I wait to see how this story goes?
Tonight, I get the feeling God welcomes my questions. I think he enjoys how much I enjoy him telling his story. I think perhaps he throws in some of those special hidden details because he knows I’ll search for them, and when I find them, I will love him even more. I really believe God loves to love me. I really believe God cares about me. I really believe God never gives up on me, never gets tired of me, and never leaves me. I really believe God delights in every detail of my life and he gladly holds my hand. I really believe God gets a kick out of me being filled with wonder at the work of his hands. And I believe he loves you that much and more. I believe he loves you in the way you love to be loved.
Even though for a brief moment tonight I felt there was a part of my story God has neglected, he compelled me to begin writing, and in the midst of these words, he has reminded me that no part of me is forgotten. I am entirely known by him, my Creator and my Sustainer. This story is not finished yet. I need to hold on and trust him in the waiting. I need not fear the future or the past, but press on believing he’s already there, and surely his goodness and unfailing love will follow me all the days of my life.
I thank God I know him as my God. I pray he makes himself known in your heart tonight as your God. I pray he reveals himself to those around the world who have never heard his name before tonight.
Lord, I know my story is not the most important story. I know how the most important story ends. So with a grateful heart I pray you use this generation of believers to spread your fame across the globe. I pray you come back soon. And I thank you for loving me better than anyone else could ever love me as I wait for you to carry me home with you forever. With all my heart, I love you.